Wanting and willing are two different things. Wanting is stomping up and down, demanding, insisting. Wanting is pouting, whining, wallowing in self-will and self-pity. I can want to be free, but still not be willing to do anything to cooperate with my want. In other words, I can pray and I can plead and I can beg and express my want and my frustration forever and only make myself more resentful and bitter that God won’t give me what I want.
In contrast, being willing is saying, okay, I’m ready to cooperate. I’m willing to go along with the truth I have to accept and allow into my life. I’m willing to humble myself and to seek the guidance and the grace I need from the only Source that is always with me, always only a thought away. In other words, I have to be willing to turn to God, as I best understand God, as often as I need to during my hours and my days. Really, even in my hours, if that’s what it takes. I have to be willing to cry out to Him in my heart as often as the lying, deceiving, self-defeating and self-destructive thoughts start badgering me again.